Getting to know Betsy...
If you possessed the courage, talent and resources to do anything, what would you do?
OK, this is not some deep and meaningful answer, but I have always dreamed of starring on Broadway! I imagine myself playing these amazing strong roles, being center stage, singing and dancing my heart out. I will never have the courage to do something like that, but it is fun to dream. :)
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My life is surrounded by engineers. Engineering is in my blood and many times I think like an engineer. What is the equation to make this work? What is the formula that will get this in order? Lately the word that I would use to describe my life is “messy”. In all aspects… physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. There are always times in life when it is going a mile a minute and you can’t catch up, but then you do and you get the order back in your life. Life has just not slowed down for me and I am having a difficult time dealing with that. There is no equation. There is no formula. I am feeling “lost” in the mess. Many have tried to show me the equation and sometimes that makes it worse. Satan uses those opportunities to try to tell me “ if you would only do this… your life would be in order again”. I think that what God is trying to teach me right now is how to live a full and abundant life WITHIN the “mess”. That I don’t get an equation for the time being and I need to be OK with that.
For many months, I have not been able to sing the following song without tears falling. It explains the different seasons of our life. Each of these seasons have been present in my life within the past year.
The Desert Song
This is my prayer in the desert
When all that’s within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides
This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames
This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I’ll stand
And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here
ALL OF MY LIFE
IN EVERY SEASON
YOU ARE STILL GOD
I HAVE A REASON TO SING
I HAVE A REASON TO WORSHIP
What season are you in?
I am in the season of battle. The Enemy is strong, but my God is stronger. This battle has already been won, but Satan will not stop trying to convince me otherwise.
“ Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. “
Ephesians 6: 10-12
The last verse of The Desert Song is this:
This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I’m filled to be empty again
This seed I received I will sow
I don’t have an official definition for “the harvest”, and it may be different for everyone, but I believe that “the harvest” is a time when God's will and our desires meet. A time to rest and breathe. A time to be filled with truth and love, so that God can prepare you for the next season.
Prayer requests:
1. For strength to endure the battle
2. To hear God’s voice clearly in the decisions we are currently making that may have a big impact on our life and the lives of others
2 comments:
Broadway, huh? I never knew! You've got the voice. Let's just get you some tap shoes, and you'll be good to go!
I completely understand your analogy to formulas--that is always why I loved Math so much. One answer, and one way to get there. Life is definitely NOT that way. Life is messy, and it is hard. I will be praying for you during this especially messy time. I will pray that you continue to seek Him and realize the lies that satan uses to get us down.
In the mean time, feel free to use your label maker as therapy ;-).
Betsy - I think like you - I was once a physics major and considered math or computer science, too. Yay equations!! ;) Before I came to know God, I treated my life like an equation. I planned everything to the finest, neatest detail, and then I entered a season where it all fell apart and couldn't be recovered (involving death of loved ones, a large and unexpected debt, being dumped in an important relationship, and academic failure). I was humbled to learn that God had a different plan for me because He wanted me to live a better life that would glorify Him. When life gets crazy and messy, I think back on that time and thank Him for using the messes in life to bring me closer to Him and do my best to let the logical, controlling me just breathe and step back. You can't avoid the messes in life, but you can keep the perspective that it is not eternal (God WILL deliver on his promises to you), and that it is an opportunity to yield to God's loving sovereignty in your life and glorify Him! Let things be messy - He'll carry you through this time!
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